Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Tough To Say Goodbye

I am saying goodbye to my store.

It wasn't a decision I made overnight. It has been coming for a while. First strike was the e-books. Second had been the recession. But I guess I would still have tried to weather it, if I didn't have to move. It's tough to carry all these books from one place to another (although I already did it twice) but this time I am moving far away and just can't afford to ship it all with me. It would be way too expensive (not something I can afford).

It breaks my heart to close my store down. I build it from nothing. Well OK, I had a book or two (or a few hundred) that I didn't know where to put. Could not throw them away, that's just not me. I had to find new homes for them. I managed for some. But still have some remaining. I will take the bookmarks with me though. They are light enough to carry. And I just can't discard all the effort and time that went in to making them.

I never thought it would be so hard to say goodbye to a store. Especially when I knew the closing was coming. I thought I worked through these emotions when I decided to dismantle my library and give my books away. The books that I wanted to keep. Now it is just coming to an end. The last of it needs to go. And that last bit appears to be the toughest to let go. I don't know why. Maybe it means something I built is coming down. Maybe it is just another unsuccessful undertaking. Maybe it is me failing yet again on something I tried hard to make it work.

Of course this isn't the end of me reading. Nor is it the end of me posting about books, or about anything else. Just the closure of the store. I may not have as much time to spend on the internet, but I doubt I will be completely absent.



  1. I'm kind of shocked! But yeah, you don't want to haul all those books with you when you move.

  2. No, I really can't. Shipping even the smallest amount of thing overseas cost a lot. I already have bunch of paper stuff (from my dissertation) and textbooks. The novels have to be left behind. :(

    Still have a couple of weeks to deal with them. Hope I'll make it.